Thursday 21 February 2008

A horrible story, and my rage

I fear this post may make you all think badly of me. But there was a story in the news today that just made my heart ache and my head spin. A newborn baby, found dead in the woods, having been dumped there shortly after birth.

I know there's a chance the mother could have been so ill, or disoriented, that she didn't know what she was doing. I know that the baby could have been born dead, and she panicked. I know that I have absolutely no concept of her personality, her background, or the circumstances that led her to abandon her child. I know that I have no right to judge her.

But I said I'd always be honest here. And what I honestly feel - in addition to the heartbreak over the poor baby, who I can't even think about without breaking into tears - is rage. Because how can it be fair that a person who is capable of dumping a baby in winter gets to HAVE one, and a person who wishes for a child with every atom of her soul, every minute of every hour of every day, doesn't?

Of course, that's just the point. It isn't fair. It isn't fair at all, but then neither are lots of things. The logical part of me understands that. But the other part of me - the yearning, desperate part that cries at song lyrics and adverts - wants to stand on something tall and scream.

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